Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

Aldi vs Oreo: Oreo maker sues Aldi over 'copycat' packaging - BBC

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

No. 2 Coco Gauff faces No. 1 Aryna Sabalenka in French Open women’s final - NBC Sports

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I understand how hurricane paths work

What is the recommended approach for creating a film or TV script? Should the script be written first or should the story be developed first? Why?

I don’t cotton to rapists

I see through liars

I actually pay taxes

Why does Boko Haram attack its own Muslims?

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

China Considers Ordering Hundreds of Airbus Jets in Major Deal - Bloomberg.com

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

Scientists just learned the age of America's deepest canyon - SFGATE

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I have complete contempt for fakery

Why are American university students fine with sharing a room?

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

Lawsuit says mayor called people who opposed Buc-ee's project 'terrorists' - 9News

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I can read

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

What happens in Sweden if you cannot pay a hospital debt you did not know about until recently but willing to pay when your finances improve?

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

How do you stop your balls from sweating?

I can count

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

Colorado has now recorded 10 measles cases this year as airport outbreak grows - GazetteXtra

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

Sega Throws Shade At Mario Kart While Showing Off Sonic Racing: Crossworlds - Kotaku

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

Another Bodybuilder Just Died a Horrible Death - futurism.com

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

I don’t buy bullshit

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I have a reading level above third grade

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”